Wednesday, April 9, 2014

That's Life (as Frankie Says)

So I mentioned in my last post how I have a "weak constitution" and don't deal with stress well, so I thought I'd provide you with some anecdotal evidence of such.

The other night, I woke up in the middle of the night to a feeling, with the closest thing I can describe is the feeling of when you have your lady 'stache waxed off (you know that burning, tingling, irritated feeling? oh, you don't have a lady 'stache? Lucky you. Darn Italian genes.) But this was on my stomach. And, I am not at the point in my life (and hopefully never will be) that I need to have my stomach waxed.

So, I decide this merits extricating myself from the baby and son who are sleeping with/on me (Son 1 sleeps in his own bed, but somehow migrates into ours without me knowing) and checking it out. I have to do this very stealthily, because waking them up is not an option.

So I stumble into the family room, which isn't very far because our house is small, and Mike is passed out on the couch, where he usually is when he falls asleep watching something such as Star Trek (the Next Generation, I Love Patrick Stewart. I digress).

I lift up my shirt to inspect tummy, and low and behold is a funky rash. "Look Mike," I say, "I've got a funky rash."

He mumbles something like "That's nice" and stumbles off too bed. (We're doing a lot of stumbling tonight.)

My first thought is, "oh sh*t, the carpet beetles are back." We had a carpet beetle infestation a couple of years ago. It sucked.

So I break out the google, and research "carpet beetles." But, they don't bite. Then I am thinking, "aw crap, it's bed bugs." Even though we haven't traveled anywhere. It's the middle of the night, and I am not thinking properly. So I google all types of bug bites, and then I decide it's mosquitoes. And I go back to bed.

The next day the rash is still there and itching and burning. While inspecting it, Mike says "Whoa, you've got a funky rash! You should get that checked out!" And I'm like yeah, I showed you last night. But he doesn't remember. Whatever.

So then I show my mom, and she tells me I should get it checked out.

I go to the doctor, and low and behold, I have shingles. She says it usually only happens to old people but if you are stressed and run down, sometimes it can happen then. (Weak Constitution!)

I get a prescription for Valtrex, which she says is okay for nursing.

But, I go home and break out the google again, just to make sure it's okay for nursing.

While researching, I find out Valtrex primarily treats genital herpes. "Great," I'm thinking. The pharmacist is going to look at me and think I am genital herpes girl.

"No matter," I say to myself. The pharmacist is probably some old guy who I will never see again.

Commence pharmacy trip.

I am standing in line, waiting to pick up my prescription. I am staring around, and notice the sign with the name of my pharmacist today.

"Huh," I think. "That name is familiar".

That is the problem about living where you grew up. You always run into people you knew (like old dates, past mean girls, etc.) on a day where you've forgone yet another shower (I can go one more day, right?) and decided your pajamas could pass for clothes today.

The name is familiar, I remember, because that guy went to school with my husband.

Great, so now I am genital herpes girl who also doesn't shower.

But, that's life right?

6 comments:

  1. Oh goodness, Katie! I had shingles back in college, and it was so painful. I had them in my throat. Hopefully your experience isn't as painful. It's amazing to realize what stress can do to the body, isn't it?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh my goodness in your throat! Ah! That sounds like the worst.
      I hope you are doing well! I will email you when I get the chance!

      Delete
  2. Karie, I hope you feel better soon. So you are the herpes girl who watches Star Trek instead of showering. :-). I don't know much about shingles, do you have to worry about the baby getting them?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I sound like someone who should have never left their parent's basement don't I?
      The baby can get them because he hasn't been vaxed for chicken pox yet, but only if he touches my rash. And he wouldn't get shingles, he would get chicken pox. It is weird like that. Luckily I have kept it covered
      Thanks for the well wishes!.

      Delete
  3. I remember my maths teacher getting Shingles - and I knew it was somehow related to chicken pox, as you mention above.

    I loved the way you told this story, I really did!! Just delightful really. And the awkward moment at the pharmacy - I've had the same thing at the grocery store once... ekk!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks! I always see people I know at the grocery. I usually try to hide or duck down another aisle.

      Delete